#80: Saying Yes to Yourself: What Happens When You Commit to Something Big
Hello and welcome to Find Yourself, Change Your Life. I’m your host, Mary Clavieres. This podcast is here to help you rediscover yourself and become the leader of your life, however you want that to look.
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We’re all about the mind-body connection. I’m weaving in Human Design and other types of mind-body practices, all meant to support you with reconnecting to yourself and getting to your deeper purpose. When we change things within us, when we show up to do the work and reconnect with ourselves, it has a positive ripple effect in the world.
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Today’s Episode: When You Say Yes to Yourself, Things Start
For today’s episode, I wanted to share a story and a perspective and kind of an understanding around something that I’ve come to learn more about in my life in different ways. It’s a fun kind of perspective of playing with the universe, is how I look at it.
Quite a few of my stories that show up this way are things that happen when I say yes to something.
When you commit to something new (my examples here will be around travel because I do so much travel, either for work, visiting friends and family since we live in France, or when I go on pilgrimages) what I’ve seen is that in these cases where you decide to stretch yourself in some way, or you sign up for something new and you say yes to it, right at that time when you say yes, it’s all systems go.
Anything is possible to help bring you into alignment with that. It might show some things that feel hard. It might open some new pathways more smoothly. It depends on the situation. But know that as you say yes to things, it will shift things right from when you say yes.
The First Time I Said Yes to Egypt
The first time I went to Egypt, I said yes in May or June, and the trip was in December. And things started to happen as soon as I said yes.
Things started happening in May and June that were preparing me for Egypt in December.
My dream time and my dream space got very heightened. I had visits and I didn’t even know at the time. The first time I went to Egypt, I really didn’t know much of anything about Egypt. I didn’t know about the gods or goddesses or any of the stories. I just knew okay, there’s the pyramids. I want to see the pyramids. That was kind of it.
But once I said yes to the trip, I got dreams and some, let’s say, visitations. If you’re familiar with Sekhmet… she is a prominent figure there, the half-human, half cat or lion, she came to me in a dream and I was like, what is happening? Because I didn’t know, but because I had said yes, different things started to open.
The Stretching That Comes With Saying Yes to Yourself
Other things can make you stretch too. Before I went, one of my daughters had a really hard time. She was saying, why are you going? Why can’t you stay here? She didn’t want me to leave. She’s not usually like that, but for a few weeks before, she was like that.
And I was just watching all these different things happen that are part of the process and part of living out these experiences that stretch us more, those times where we feel really called to grow in different ways.
Some of them are really cool and fun and magical, and it might be dreams. And some of it feels heavy. I even talked previously on the podcast about healing my fear of heights. That happened after I said yes to Egypt because I wanted to go in the hot air balloon, and I had a lifelong fear of heights that would not let me go up. But in my dream space, I had experiences that helped me to heal that. You can hear more about that experience here.
It stretches us in all the ways… the fun and magical ways, the ways that feel scary, the ways that feel really heavy. All of them.
Saying Yes to Yourself - Contraction Comes With Expansion
If you are someone that is looking to have this kind of experience, or you’re planning something, or you’re dreaming of something, just know that this is part of the process.
Anytime that you really challenge yourself or you put yourself out there in a different way and you commit to something that is like a full body yes for you, there is sometimes also contraction that comes with it. And know that that is normal. It’s part of the process.
I find that when you know that, it’s a little easier to navigate. You can watch things from an observer consciousness (an observer point of view) and take a step back and say, okay, why are these things happening? As my friend Kat would say: why is this in my movie? And you can look at it and see… oh, actually I said yes to this big thing, so now these other things are happening.
They may seem very related, they may seem not related at all. But I will tell you, everything is related. Every single thing in your life is all intertwined and related in some way.
The Before, the During, and the After of Saying Yes to Yourself
For purposes of this episode, I wanted to talk about the before just so that you have an awareness that when you say yes, that’s when the things start.
I feel like people are more aware of the during and the after because it’s more like a cause and effect type of thing. Like, oh well, I went on this trip and then these things happened when I got back. But people don’t actually necessarily think of the time from when they say yes to the thing and before they actually get there.
A lot of things can happen in that space.
With Egypt, for example, I said yes and got the dreams. The different things happened… the dreams with Sekhmet, the healing with my fear of heights. I had this stuff with my daughter and her not wanting me to go. And then there’s the whole experience of being there. And then there’s the whole integration after and what shows up afterwards, how you come back with this different type of energy, this different frequency. And how does your family and your family nervous system handle what you are carrying there?
Oh my goodness. There are so many different parts. I feel like I might just want to do a series or just mix in episodes about Egypt. I love it so much.
What Are You Saying Yes to Right Now?
We are in September. There are a few months left for this year. Maybe you’re saying yes to something big for the remainder of this year. Maybe you’re gearing yourself up for something in the new year. Or maybe you’re like, I have no idea yet. It’s September and I just want to get through the holidays. That’s fine too.
But if you’re in one of those points right now, or you’re in a reflection point for yourself, you can say… okay, what’s on the horizon for me?
This is not to scare you out of doing it. If anything, I want to say do it. Do it now so that you get that momentum and you recognize the stretching at the same time. It’s a beautiful process.
But if you’re looking at something, you can go into it with eyes a little more open to say okay, I’m going to stretch in this way. And so some other things might come with it. How can I bring it into my awareness and be prepared from now? Just have this knowing that when you stretch and say yes to something, you are opening yourself up for so much more magic. And it actually starts right when you say yes.
The Egypt Invitation
If you’ve been feeling the call of Egypt, I’m going this December again with my dear friend and mentor, Sarah Naia Soleil. If you want more information, please feel free to message me. I’d love to see you there.
It’s a beautiful, big commitment in different ways. It stretches you and expands you like nothing else, or nothing else I’ve experienced at least. If you feel the call to that, definitely reach out on any of the socials or by email.
What are you saying yes to at this time in your life? I am so grateful for you. Thank you for being here. Sending lots of love. Talk to you next week.
The Return Community
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Other Resources:
Ep #31 Egypt and My Fear of Heights: A Journey in Personal Transformation
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Frequently Asked Questions
Q: What does “saying yes to yourself” mean? A: It means committing to something that feels like a full body yes… something that stretches you, grows you, expands you. Not saying yes to please others, but saying yes to what you genuinely feel called to do or experience. As Mary shares in this episode, when you say yes to yourself in this way, things start to shift immediately, often before you even get to the experience itself.
Q: Why do hard things happen after you commit to something big? A: Mary describes this as the contraction that comes with expansion. When you say yes to something that stretches you, you’re opening yourself up and that can bring up fears, resistance, and challenges alongside the magic. She shares examples from her Egypt experience: her daughter’s unexpected resistance, the heightened dreams, the fear of heights she needed to heal. All of it was part of the preparation process that began the moment she said yes.
Q: What is observer consciousness? A: It’s the practice of stepping back from what’s happening in your life and watching it from a slight distance, asking “why is this in my movie?” rather than being swept up in it. As Mary’s friend Kat says, it’s a way of getting curious about why certain things are showing up, rather than just reacting to them.
Q: Who is Sekhmet? A: Sekhmet is a prominent figure in Egyptian mythology, often depicted as half-human, half lion or cat. Mary mentions that before her first trip to Egypt, Sekhmet appeared in her dreams which she later understood as part of the preparation that began when she said yes to the trip, even though she knew nothing about Egyptian mythology at the time.
Q: What is the before, during and after framework? A: Mary’s way of describing the full arc of saying yes to something big. The before is the period from when you commit to when you arrive… when things start shifting, dreams heighten, challenges surface. The during is the experience itself. The after is the integration… how you come back changed, and how your life and the people around you respond to who you’ve become. Most people focus on the during and after. This episode is specifically about the before.
Q: What is the Return Community? A: A one-year membership community created by Mary Clavieres for people who want to practice reconnecting to themselves with tools, support, and community. Mind-body connection, Human Design, monthly calls, quarterly workshops. Bonuses available until October 1. Details at community.maryclaivieres.com.
Q: How do I know if something is a full body yes? A: Mary describes it as a sense of being really called to something not just intellectually interested but feeling it in your body. It’s the kind of yes that also comes with some fear or resistance, because it’s asking you to stretch. If it only feels completely comfortable and safe, it might not be the kind of yes that opens things up.
