#32: Why Letting Go Is Hard and How to Make It Easier
Why Letting Go Is Hard and How to Make It Easier
Hello and welcome! I’m Mary Clavieres, and today I want to dive into something that comes up all the time, both in my own life and with my clients: why letting go is hard and how to make it easier.
Whether you’re struggling to let go of stress, worrying about the future, or holding onto something from the past, these feelings are part of being human. You’re not alone, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with finding yourself stuck in this space. In fact, the universal nature of this struggle is exactly why letting go is hard for so many of us.
But the reasons why letting go is hard and how to make it easier—well, those are what I want to focus on today. If you’ve been stuck overanalyzing, worrying about what’s to come, or replaying past conversations or disappointments, know that it’s entirely normal. The good news is that, just like any other skill, you can get better at letting go with practice.
The Common Ways We Struggle to Let Go
Letting go can take a lot of different forms. Maybe you’re hanging onto a stressful situation at work, a disagreement in a friendship, or simply overthinking your to-do list. These are all moments when we wish we could release what’s weighing us down. The core reason why letting go is hard often comes down to the underlying attachment, emotional significance, or even just a deep pattern of habitual thinking.
Sometimes, our minds get stuck in loops—worrying about what hasn’t happened yet or dwelling on what we wish had gone differently. For me, I noticed that one way to make shifting out of worry easier is to use a simple mantra. Whenever I catch myself worrying about the future, I tell myself, “This isn’t for right now.” It’s a gentle reminder to bring myself back to the present moment, because being present is truly where our power lies. Practicing this mantra over and over helps rewire those repetitive thoughts, and this is one way how to make letting go easier for yourself.
Shifting Perspectives on the Past
When we’re holding on to something in the past—maybe a disagreement or a painful experience—why letting go is hard can often be traced back to emotional residue or unresolved intentions. Ignoring these feelings usually doesn’t work; they tend to bubble back up later.
Instead, try looking for a new perspective: What might I be missing here? Can I find compassion or understanding for the other person involved? It doesn’t mean you have to accept their viewpoint, but just bringing some compassion to the situation can ease your own worry, sadness, or overanalyzing.
It’s worth noting: letting go is often not “one and done.” Grief, disappointment, and significant emotional events don’t leave us instantly. Feelings ebb and flow—they recede, return, and with time, gradually lose their hold. Remember, this is a normal part of the process. Understanding this back-and-forth is yet another key insight into why letting go is hard and how to make it easier.
Tools for Making Letting Go Easier
So, what are some simple tools you can try if you’re working through your own challenge around letting go?
Use a Mantra: When anxiety about the future arises, repeat a grounding statement like “this isn’t for right now” to gently return to the present.
Seek Perspective: Try to see if there’s something you might be missing, or if you can empathize with the other parties involved. Compassion for yourself (and others) can loosen the grip of difficult emotions.
Allow Space for Your Feelings: Instead of pushing away your emotions, allow yourself to feel them, however messy or inconvenient they may be. Sometimes, sitting with discomfort is what eventually helps us let go.
Recognize the Non-Linear Nature of Letting Go: Just because you’ve felt better for a while doesn’t mean old feelings won’t spring up again. Give yourself patience and grace.
Community and Support: Sometimes, listening to a podcast, joining a transformative trip (like my journey to Egypt this December!), or simply reaching out to a trusted friend can provide the extra support you need.
Final Thoughts on Why Letting Go is Hard and How to Make it Easier
Letting go isn’t about erasing the hard stuff or pretending everything’s fine. It’s a practice… an ongoing journey. Understanding why letting go is hard and how to make it easier is about honoring your feelings, learning new tools, and being patient with yourself as you practice.
If you’re finding it hard right now, that’s okay. You’re not broken, and you’re not alone. With practice, intention, and kindness toward yourself, letting go can become a little bit easier, one step at a time.
Thanks for reading and for being part of this shared journey. If you’d like more support, or want to learn about my new book, Mind Body Connection Unlocked, or the upcoming journey to Egypt, check the links below. I’m always here to help!
Special announcement:
I’m honored to announce that I’ve been invited to join my dear friend and mentor, Sarah Naia Soleil, as a support sister on her 9th annual journey to Egypt.
You’re invited to learn more and join us on this special journey to Egypt.
Mind-Body Connection Unlocked:
Mind-Body Connection Unlocked book is officially available for pre order. This book has experiences, tools, tips, resources, all of the things to support you in strengthening and deepening your own mind-body connection.
We are very disconnected from our bodies and the more that we can get back in touch with that, the more that we can get out of our minds and into our bodies, the more deeply we can feel and experience life in a way that's in alignment for us.
Thank you so much again for being here today and for your support.
If you’d like to connect further about unlocking the next step in your personal development journey, please feel free to reach out. I'm on LinkedIn and Instagram. I'm also on Voxer at @MaryClavieres.
Previous Episodes You May Enjoy:
Egypt and Overcoming My Fear of Heights: A Journey in Personal Transformation
Health, Fears and Intuition with the Spleen Center Human Design [Discover Who You Are Series]
Unlocking Self-Worth: Exploring the Heart Center Human Design [Discover Who You Are Series]
Exploring Your Emotions Through the Solar Plexus Center Human Design [Discover Who You Are Series]
Exploring Certainty Through the Ajna Center Human Design [Discover Who You Are Series]
Throat Center Human Design [Discover Who You Are Series]
